If she gets stressed, she can just pop in some Enya. Oh, wait.

I read today that Enya has a stalker, and when he broke into her house, she hid in her panic room. Enya has a panic room? Enya? Enya, whose music puts you to sleep at the dentist? And gets you calm for back adjustments? And helps Keanu find his inner child? That Enya? Has a panic room?

Jeez. If she can't chill out, who can?

You know what, though? I bet her panic room smells fantastic. She seems like a scented candle sort of gal to me.

Her Ringtone was a TV Theme I Can't Place

I SSSHHHed someone in a movie theater today. I feel a little weird about it, like I feel if I lose my temper over something shallow. She talked during the entire movie, and then her cell phone rang--of course--and she answered it.

And had a little conversation.

On her phone.

During a movie.

Not on her sofa at home, but in a theater with others around. She was probably mid-fifties, so I know she's familiar with etiquette and the various social laws of the movie theater.

See, what I wanted to do was say, "Hey asshole, turn off your phone, bitch." Maybe I would swap the order of "asshole" and "bitch", but I feel like they're both necessary. But I just SSSHHHed, and she probably didn't even know it was for her. And I laughed about it later with my friend, but I feel all guilty like I punched her or something.

Maybe I need more caffeine? Less?

Also feeling guilty about: Not flossing for, oh let's say...weeks; not working on my novel; not letting the dog walk as far as he'd like

A Novel in a Month

Wish me luck.

Halloween

Not only the first pumpkin I've carved in well over a decade; it's the first I ever carved by myself. Not bad, huh?