I Bet They're Thrilled I Don't Have Kids

A couple days ago at work, I told this story:

"Last night, I made a grilled cheese for dinner. I got some mustard on my hand and went to get a paper towel. When I came back, Bandit was eating my sandwich."

I told it like five times. I even pantomimed a dog eating a sandwich.

It's official: there's not a single interesting thing left about me.